Real quick one.

I can no longer tolerate people who come out of the gate telling me to “SMILE!”

Fuck off. Tell me a joke if you want to see my teeth.

I have been dealing with this for a very long time. I’m just not the fucking smiley type for no goddamn reason. But it does NOT mean that I am unhappy, angry, or in a bad mood.

I happen to have a mood disorder, as some of you know. And I run high almost all of the time. Which probably means I am in a better mood than any person who comes along telling me to “SMILE!”. I am irreverent, always on, only serious when necessary. That is my default setting. I don’t need to use my teeth to be full of fucking mirth. That’s because I can talk and know how to use sarcasm and point out irony and am not afraid to cross a polite boundary. I’m laughing at most of you all of the time on the inside, if you want to know the truth. Really, the only difference between us is that I am an idiot, and you are all grinning idiots. You look crazier than I do, and that’s saying something.

So please, do not tell me what to do with my face. It borders on rudeness.

How would you like it if I told you loudly to “FROWN!”?

It would probably startle you as much as it startles me when you yell “SMILE!”.