Daily Archives: January 21, 2011

I Thought People Liked The Sun

Evidently, I am incorrect. There is a whole bunch of balderdash on the Internet today, and all it makes me think of is how nice it is outside. Metaphors abound, songs keep running through my head like cackling ghosts who just flew out of a closet and now they don’t leave.

All because people are freaking out about better days ahead. I have a few explanations, but that’s all I have. I am guessing here when I say this, but I think we simply have a spatial anomaly on our hands that is mucking with what the Earth usually likes to do. I have guessed so far that the poles of the earth have shifted, thus accounting for the weird way the night sky looks. I don’t have a big problem with it; it is unique and these eyes have never seen such a thing. Time magazine is thinking Betelgeuse is the culprit, and so far I have no reason to argue with them because extra gravity from a nearby star will definitely cause us to wobble a bit. But, essentially, the earth is still doing what it does, what is has been doing for a while, bouncing and wobbling underneath the forces that are around it.

I’ll be generous and call this a metaphor for a family. Your barking dogs, slinking cats, your utterly fascinating, frighteningly tuned-in and keyed-up children, your beguiling wife, and of course your sick mother and your weird dad, and all of the siblings you know doing something else because they are second children and that appears to be what second children do. I can only describe my own, because these are the only terms I am entitled to. You all have your own, and I am pleased with this. Unfortunately, there are strange stories everywhere, and people are reacting like their hair is on fire. That’s not a good thing to do, because fire has a tendency to enjoy itself immensely when you do this.

I am used to being displeased with people when they run around like this. It’s like I almost want you to have a good day, for a change. Certain people will not get off so easily, and I deal with them when I have the time. But for now, all I have is sunshine, and I like it.

I’ll find out a way to upset someone, but it would appear that literally, the stars will not let me today. I feel like I am having some sort of a “birthday” hangover, when all I have is an actual one, to be quite honest. I’ve had plenty. I will probably make more, but sometimes hangovers will make you unable to do stuff. At 39, with two bad legs, a lost mind and a chip on my shoulder, I can’t argue with the way things are at this moment. Grrr.

Scary noises from this old man are a sign from him that you should go make someone else’s day. I hope I have made yours, whomever I have tangled with for good or bad today. In the unlikely event that this mood continues, I will return here with a full grouch on.

I must see you then. I’m sure something needs doing around here, because I am sure I am still the same God-Damned Idiot that I was yesterday and am most likely in trouble for something I am not aware of. That might be beguiling in and of itself. Bounce and wobble a little. That is how the game, whatever it may be, is played.

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