Daily Archives: March 14, 2015

Tall Tales

The cult of Reagan is alive and well. Here’s Scott Walker with a delightful(but untrue) anecdote about the departed president:

He described being invited by Nancy Reagan to give a speech at the Reagan Library near Los Angeles in November 2012, five months after he won a recall election that stemmed from his successful effort to curtail the union rights of public employees in his state. Walker said he met with Nancy Reagan before the speech and told her that he had won the recall on the eighth anniversary of Ronald Reagan’s death.

Walker went on to describe how, during a tour of the library before the speech, the library curator “unbeknownst to me” had taken the Reagan family Bible out of its display and readied it for him to look at.

“And they brought over a pair of white gloves to me and they said, ‘No one has touched this since President Reagan. It is his mother’s Bible that he took the oath of office on. Mrs. Reagan would like you to hold it and take a picture with it’,” Walker said in a YouTube video of part of the speech posted by a reporter for the liberal magazine The Progressive.

Audience members can be heard gasping, then applauding as Walker tells the story.

Walker, 47, frequently notes that his wedding anniversary and Reagan’s birthday fall on the same date.

Blah blah Reagan blah Reagan Reagan. It’s nothing short of creepy, the way they fetishize the old boob and his stuff. What is it, the fucking shroud of Turin to these rubes? Scott Walker and his handlers are very clever, playing on the atavistic tendencies of your average dumb Republican voter. So far, he has avoided controversy by steering clear of the crazy talk that a Ben Carson trucks in. No one consequential blinked an eye when he flipped on ethanol subsidies, because Walker is aware that he needs the rural sucker to build his base. And now, here he is, genuflecting to the demigods of the movement. These sad-sacks will in all likelihood not notice that Walker is lying to them; they will hold that Reagan story close to their hearts, because the “liberal media” are the real liars.

But I’m not going to worry about Scott Walker. It goes one of two ways; he implodes by saying something loony or stupid, or he gets the nomination and receives  a shellacking in 2016. Walker’s ultimate weakness is that he is boring. He can claim the right to Reagan’s legacy all he wants, but that won’t bridge what I’m certain will be an enthusiasm gap when it all shakes out.

Buzz Lightyear

That’s my new name for Ted Cruz after seeing this:

Sen. Ted Cruz thinks NASA should spend less time studying the planet and more time finding ways to go out into space.

“Almost any American would agree that the core function of NASA is to explore space,” he said. “That’s what inspires little boys and little girls across this country … and you know that I am concerned that NASA in the current environment has lost its full focus on that core mission.”

I don’t feel comfortable with having a sitting senator be in charge of appropriating money to research based on the whims of a hypothetical 6 year old. So the poor NASA administrator had to patiently explain to this know-nothing what else NASA does besides going to infinity and beyond:

“Our core mission from the very beginning has been to investigate, explore space and the Earth environment, and to help us make this place a better place,” (Charles)Bolden said.

“It is absolutely critical that we understand Earth’s environment because this is the only place that we have to live,” Bolden said. “Science helps exploration; exploration helps science.”

Bolden defended NASA’s work here on Earth. NASA compiles data on the planet’s air pollution via satellite, engages in research on new forms of energy, and is a key agency for climate change and ice melt data. Bolden alluded to the agency’s study of climate change in his response to Cruz, saying that the agency can’t do any of its work — on the ground or up in space — “if the Kennedy Space Center goes underwater and we don’t know it.” That’s not a hyperbolic worry — scientists have warned that sea level rise is putting the Kennedy Center, which is located in Florida, at risk.

So to Cruz, NASA is a hothouse of liberalism. Got it. Excuse me while I double dose my Wellbutrin.

A Holy Mi$$ion

Remember Oral Roberts? The fraud who had the brass balls to ask for 8 million dollars from his followers or God would kill him? Move over, ’cause Creflo don’t fly coach:

Televangelist Creflo Dollar has asked 200,000 followers to donate $300 apiece so he can buy a luxury jet to preach worldwide.

“We are asking members, partners, and supporters of this ministry to assist us in acquiring a Gulfstream G650 airplane so that Pastors Creflo and Taffi and World Changers Church International can continue to blanket the globe with the Gospel of grace.”

According to outlets, the jet costs about $65 million.

He also would like people who don’t tithe to his scam to be shot. How these people sleep at night I will never know. How do you trust a preacher with currency in his name anyway?


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