Daily Archives: April 19, 2015

You Voted Them In

Today’s “Stupidest Fucking Thing I Have Heard All Day” prize goes to newbie representative Dave Brat of Virginia:

Rep. David Brat (R-VA) on Thursday, during a conversation with Lars Larson at the “Hold Their Feet To The Fire” conference, blamed Obamacare for moving America away from a free market system and making the country more like North Korea.

“Look at every country in the world,” Brat said. “Look at North Korea and South Korea. It’s the same culture, it’s the same people, look at a map at night, half the, one of the countries is not lit, there’s no lights, and the bottom free-market country, all Koreans, is lit up. See you make your bet on which country you want to be, right? You want to go free market.”

“We have poverty on the rise because we’re moving away from free markets,” Brat added.

Brat also said business was a “morally good calling” but lamented that that message wasn’t being taught in schools, which, he maintained was problematic.

Uh, South Korea has universal, compulsory healthcare. These dumb dumbasses just talk and talk and just lie or fucking don’t know anything. As John Lydon says, this is what you want, this is what you get. Now show up on Election Day and vote these ignoramuses out. Clean house, people.

In The Drink

Hey. I went on vacation at my mother’s hideaway in the swamps of South Carolina. She took drastic measures to not have any neighbors and bought a mobile home on bricks. We always try to go someplace interesting when we are there, and our first stop was at James Island. They were having some sort of aquatic fair where you could rent paddleboats, try out a kayak, buy water gear, learn a bit of archery and so on. I had no intention of participating in these activities. My mother is much more concerned with my children having a good time. But something attracted me. There were people on a surfboard type gizmo with a paddle, and people were gliding to and fro with ease on the board. Well, I said, every one else seems to be able to do this, surely I can as well.

I began on my knees. The paddleboard guide said stay there. But I wanted the thrill that so many others found easy. So I attempted to stand. I was too far on the front edge of the board to keep it steady. Then this happened.

Paddle Problem

That’s me, clinging to the board after it upended me. I was wearing ordinary clothes so I would be soaked for the whole day. I was mad at first, but I have some distance from it and now it is rather funny. My pride was so hurt, people. I wanted to try new things, is all. This is what I get for showboating…or more accurately, show paddling.

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