Daily Archives: May 22, 2015

Judge Dread

The “honorable” Roy Moore, he of the Ten Commandments kerfuffle and other transgressions against the First Amendment, has got some sage advice for all of us sinners:

The “pursuit of happiness” mentioned in the Declaration of Independence refers to following biblical teachings, according to Alabama’s chief justice.

The pursuit of happiness, he continued, did not mean “two cars and four television and five homes and a lot of food.”

“It’s laws of God, for he is so intimately connected, so inseparably interwoven the laws of eternal justice with the happiness of each individual that the latter cannot be obtained but by observing the former, and if the formerly be punctually abated it cannot help but induce the latter. You can’t help but be happy if you follow God’s law and if you follow God’s law, you can’t help but be happy,” Moore explained.

I have the distinct advantage of being on both sides of the belief divide. I was a born-again Christian for five years of my young life. And I was ostracized and ridiculed for my beliefs in school. Yet I dutifully praised God and followed his book. It’s funny, but I don’t remember ever being “happy” doing that. And the kids at church were no more holy or righteous than any secular kid. I don’t remember feeling much about it at all. That being the case, it was easy to abandon. I don’t know if I can say I am happier as an atheist, because when you get down to it, no “belief” (or disbelief in my case) can make you happy, any happier than material wealth can. Happy is a weird thing. I suspect people who crave happiness are deep down the saddest people you will know, and I feel sorry for those people. Happy is fleeting. I don’t do happy; I shoot for content. And I make it there every time.

Fuck God’s law, whatever that means. Subservience does not equal joy, unless you are a masochistic loon.

Picking A Hill To Die On

Shorter Mike Huckabee: I was totally kidding when I said I wanted to be president.

Goodbye, numbnuts.

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